Responsibility

[Kamma70]

How horrible would it be for a person to walk away from responsibility?
To walk away from finical responsibility?
Just stop paying everything and walk away...run away..
When does enough is enough become being done with everything?
When you have paid and paid and paid, worked hard to do the right thing, gone without to be the responsible person..
When do you get a break.. when does the world stop kicking you down, not letting you back up...I use to bounce,
if something got me down, I would bounce right back up and keep going...I don't bounce anymore..
Throwing in the towel, white flag raised, I surrender....

[DiamondLil]

Kamma, I don't know what you're surrendering (no do I need to know). I've lived long enough to know that most people go through a time in their lives when they feel like giving up. The reasons vary - loss of a job, loss of a loved one, difficulty with family members, illness. Even those who have all of their material needs and wants provided run into heartache along the way. I've been there. What I've always found helpful is to consider my alternatives and the pros and cons of each. At least it provides a path to finding your way in the right way.

It might help to talk to a neutral party who can just listen, ask appropriate questions and not give advice. IOW, allow you to say it out loud as you think it through to find the best answers and alternatives for you. I'm sure that there is a crisis hot line in your area. That may be a good first stop.

Whatever steps you take, I wish you well on this troubled time in your life.

[Brian Entwistle]

Kamma, don't know what's jerking your chain or has stirred up the bees in your bonnet, but FWIW responsible people usually do the responsible thing. We can't help it, it's how we were raised, it's in our DNA. This kind of situation always begs the question, why do bad things happen to good people? Truth be known, bad things happen to all kinds, shapes and sizes of people.

When this is all over and things have quieted down, I have no doubt you will do what's right. You know you will, it makes for a better nights sleep.

Brian

[Nativeson]

How horrible would it be for a person to walk away from responsibility?
To walk away from finical responsibility?
Just stop paying everything and walk away...run away..
When does enough is enough become being done with everything?
When you have paid and paid and paid, worked hard to do the right thing, gone without to be the responsible person..
When do you get a break.. when does the world stop kicking you down, not letting you back up...I use to bounce,
if something got me down, I would bounce right back up and keep going...I don't bounce anymore..
Throwing in the towel, white flag raised, I surrender....

You need chocolate. Or whatever your pleasure of choice is to get a little morale boost. I share DL's concern for you and hope that you seek out someone that's apart from your family and situation but knows how to handle money and is willing to give you their perspective. Someone you can emulate. It's easy to weary of financial stress if there's no resolution in sight. Stay with us, sister!

[grieker]

Kamma; you still with us?

Let me be clear. Responsible people dont the responsible thing turns out in the end to be very foolish. We wake up everyday, some with excrutiating pain, go to work for ungreatful corporations/bosses with diminishing return on their investment all for WHAT? To have the goverment steal money from us and hand it out like condoms at an orgy.

I understand Kamma, I understand - and apparently many on here do as well.

Being responsible never pays off; however it's the right thing to do.

[Nativeson]

I think in the past you've referred in general terms to very unhealthy and possibly even toxic family dynamics. It isn't a given that you have to stay intertwined in those relationships. Cutting ties and getting a fresh start can work as long as the primary problem isn't you. Definately seek the counsel of someone who's outside the situation before making a move.

[Kamma70]

Like you all said, I am too damn responsible to walk away... the past 2 yrs have been really rough on me, my family, hell everyone I know...

First my daughter being sick [who is now healthy and we have answers], to my son dropping out of school,
major issues with family members who I have to deal with daily[not medical issues].....
and hubby and I have now been separated for over 2 months, working on things, but it ain't easy....
my life has been a nightmare of one thing after another...
hell we went on vacation in July and came home to a dead fridge with a weeks worth of warm, thawed food..fridge is on the back porch..son's brand new phone dead [just got the replacement last week] and my car dead on the street, the starter went...can't even have a nice vaca!

So yes, in the past 2 weeks I have just wanted to run away, run far...get away from everything and everyone....but it ain't how I was raised, it ain't the person I am... like I told hubby, we have been thru worse and came out the other side fine before, we will get thru this, somehow..
I just needed to vent and I thank you all for your care and support...
I will bounce, somehow I will

oh and BTW...I am going to be a GRANDMOM in March...the not sick daughter is pregnant...we have a light at the end of this tunnel....
I can't wait!!!

[grieker]

Like you all said, I am too damn responsible to walk away... the past 2 yrs have been really rough on me, my family, hell everyone I know...

First my daughter being sick [who is now healthy and we have answers], to my son dropping out of school,
major issues with family members who I have to deal with daily[not medical issues].....
and hubby and I have now been separated for over 2 months, working on things, but it ain't easy....
my life has been a nightmare of one thing after another...
hell we went on vacation in July and came home to a dead fridge with a weeks worth of warm, thawed food..fridge is on the back porch..son's brand new phone dead [just got the replacement last week] and my car dead on the street, the starter went...can't even have a nice vaca!

So yes, in the past 2 weeks I have just wanted to run away, run far...get away from everything and everyone....but it ain't how I was raised, it ain't the person I am... like I told hubby, we have been thru worse and came out the other side fine before, we will get thru this, somehow..
I just needed to vent and I thank you all for your care and support...
I will bounce, somehow I will

oh and BTW...I am going to be a GRANDMOM in March...the not sick daughter is pregnant...we have a light at the end of this tunnel....
I can't wait!!!

Lol, this should be in the prayer thread.

[Brian Entwistle]

Like you all said, I am too damn responsible to walk away... the past 2 yrs have been really rough on me, my family, hell everyone I know...

First my daughter being sick [who is now healthy and we have answers], to my son dropping out of school,
major issues with family members who I have to deal with daily[not medical issues].....
and hubby and I have now been separated for over 2 months, working on things, but it ain't easy....
my life has been a nightmare of one thing after another...
hell we went on vacation in July and came home to a dead fridge with a weeks worth of warm, thawed food..fridge is on the back porch..son's brand new phone dead [just got the replacement last week] and my car dead on the street, the starter went...can't even have a nice vaca!

So yes, in the past 2 weeks I have just wanted to run away, run far...get away from everything and everyone....but it ain't how I was raised, it ain't the person I am... like I told hubby, we have been thru worse and came out the other side fine before, we will get thru this, somehow..
I just needed to vent and I thank you all for your care and support...
I will bounce, somehow I will

oh and BTW...I am going to be a GRANDMOM in March...the not sick daughter is pregnant...we have a light at the end of this tunnel....
I can't wait!!!

Go get 'em grandma. I'll bet that little bundle of crying dirty diapers turns out to be the medicine for a lot of family healing.

Brian

[Nativeson]

Good to hear from you again! You had the Talkpa gang worried. Here's hoping the two of you work it out and find ways to pull together again. Hang in there, this too shall pass.

[nicle]

Kamma70 I personally do not know you however from reading your posts I can see you are a very intelligent, strong woman. You will get where peace is in your life. hugs and prayers so the journey is quick.

[Kamma70]

Hi y'all, bet you thought I had really given up and gone away...lol... I can laugh now, months later..little did I know, I would have no choice but to do just what I said, but in a different way...October and November were horror stories, can't even begin to tell you what went on, cause I truly don't remember much of it. Everything happened so fast, it made me physically sick.
Wish I could go into more, but I can't... we are all still together, more so now then before as prego daughter and boyfriend moved with us to a rental [that is haunted btw] house. The past 3 months have been one hell after another, one heartbreak, one broken dream, broken heart after another...been like living someone elses life...but pinching myself only hurts so I stopped that in october, lol

anyway, hope everyone is well. I hope to be around more, but I don't make any promises these days....

[Kamma70]

Wow.. Can't believe its been almost a year since I posted this. Damn I was at a very low point. Things didn't get better, not completely, but I learned to see things thru a new light, a new outlook.
It is what it is...that has been the words that have seen me thru so much. I plan to have them Tattooed on my leg.
Life changed so drastically since last summer. Nothing is as it was, nothing will ever be as it was and there is nothing I can do to change it. Move on from where we are now and grow from the pain we suffered, what we lost and how it changed us.
We didn't walk away, we didn't give in, throw in the towel... We made the best of what we could, started a new life with a new grandbaby who's smile makes the worst day shine...

[Martin Riggs]

How horrible would it be for a person to walk away from responsibility?
To walk away from finical responsibility?
Just stop paying everything and walk away...run away..
When does enough is enough become being done with everything?
When you have paid and paid and paid, worked hard to do the right thing, gone without to be the responsible person..
When do you get a break.. when does the world stop kicking you down, not letting you back up...I use to bounce,
if something got me down, I would bounce right back up and keep going...I don't bounce anymore..
Throwing in the towel, white flag raised, I surrender....

Never give up.......ever. The light always follows the dark.

[BBug17]

Wow.. Can't believe its been almost a year since I posted this. Damn I was at a very low point. Things didn't get better, not completely, but I learned to see things thru a new light, a new outlook.
It is what it is...that has been the words that have seen me thru so much. I plan to have them Tattooed on my leg.
Life changed so drastically since last summer. Nothing is as it was, nothing will ever be as it was and there is nothing I can do to change it. Move on from where we are now and grow from the pain we suffered, what we lost and how it changed us.
We didn't walk away, we didn't give in, throw in the towel... We made the best of what we could, started a new life with a new grandbaby who's smile makes the worst day shine...

So sorry to hear this. Let me know if I can help in any way.

[Kamma70]

Now that its all past, finally over after over a year and a half spiral...last august, hubby and I realized after 18 yrs of struggling to stay afloat, we sunk. We got a great Realtor who has helped us so much in the past year. Last friday we finally settled the house and walked away with our heads held high. No debt, no backlash from a mortgage company who refused to help for so long, but in the end, helped more then they wanted to. The house is now someone elses problem.
We moved to a rental last year and now we can begin to rebuild ourselves.

[grieker]

Now that its all past, finally over after over a year and a half spiral...last august, hubby and I realized after 18 yrs of struggling to stay afloat, we sunk. We got a great Realtor who has helped us so much in the past year. Last friday we finally settled the house and walked away with our heads held high. No debt, no backlash from a mortgage company who refused to help for so long, but in the end, helped more then they wanted to. The house is now someone elses problem.
We moved to a rental last year and now we can begin to rebuild ourselves.

You go girl! Great job. Happy Thanksgving to all!